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Edit - monday, january 03, 2011 - 18:27

Made a couple changes to my film/theater thingy, as I didn't end up seeing True Grit in 2010, and had forgotten to include Exit Through the Gift Shop. You can now move on with your lives.

Fine - thursday, december 23, 2010 - 14:21

The year in my year in film:

Tier 1:
Jackass 3D

Tier 2:
Exit Through the Gift Shop
Mesrine: Killer Instinct (L'instinct de mort)
Black Swan
Red Hill
Crazy Heart (2010, I guess?)

Tier 3:

Tier 4:
Piranha 3D
Shutter Island

Also a Kaiser Fan - tuesday, september 15, 2009 - 12:47

It was still a little embarrassing for me, but it seems that in the universe of extracting foreign objects from body cavities, the removal of a rogue piece of wax earplug (from my ear canal, sickos) from an otherwise healthy and content patient is the equivalent of a shiny Christmas present for Kaiser doctors. Mine thanked me twice and told me my visit was a delight. Considering that I called to complain of ear pain at 10:45 and was given an 11:30 appointment, the feeling of delight was mutual, K.P..

Trip Photos - thursday, july 16, 2009 - 12:12

I'm no great photographer, but if y'all are interested, here are some links to / pictures of Jody's and my (kinda weird) vacation and work trip last month. (Here's a
Best Of set for the time/work/interest constrained.)


The Algarve:






Jody's pictures are slowly going up here.

Open Letter to the Neighbor Cat - tuesday, may 12, 2009 - 12:43

Dear Drooly,
As I'm sure you're now dimly aware, in your own tiny catbrained way, there are few better examples of the wisdom of "look before you leap" than when you find yourself mid-air after launching yourself from a high fence at a freshly uncovered hot tub. I'm glad you seem to be okay. And given that you really had no good choices between landing directly in the tub, on the cactus next to the tub, or on me in the tub, I do not want you to feel bad that the cactus you tried to land on ended up with us in the tub. That dirt will come out eventually, though the prognosis for the cactus remains dire. These are the hazards that the hot tub enthusiast occasionally has to face. I'm sure it will make me a stronger hot tubber in the long term.
I hope to see you soon under less inopportune circumstances.
Yours in soaking,
El Tim

The Liquor Store That Time Forgot (aka in Soviet Russia, the beer drinks you) - monday, september 01, 2008 - 12:43

Deadstock beer. Don't let it happen to you.

If I have my Jesus Jones dates straight, the Soviet Union fell sometime around 1991. Which makes the Ruski beer I tried to drink Saturday, proudly brewed in Kiev, USSR, somewhere in the realm of 15 years old. Time was not kind to this beer. Also, now I'm sterile. Ugh.

Reading a 10,000 Word Essay on Henry James's Testicles - sunday, june 29, 2008 - 12:03

It's as good a way to spend a Sunday morning as any, I suppose.

Beirut @ The Grand Ballroom - thursday, may 29, 2008 - 11:02

Good thing I like French horns.

Open Letter to My Co-Workers, Girlfriend, and the Parking Lot Guy - wednesday, april 30, 2008 - 12:43

Dear Sirs and Madams,
I wonder exactly how long you were planning to wait to tell me my v-neck sweater was on backwards. My instincts tell me: indefinitely, but my heart would like to give you the benefit of the doubt and guess... I don't know... maybe just until after lunch.
Totally Krossed-Out,

World of Concrete 2008: In Review - wednesday, january 23, 2008 - 23:42

Now, I'm sure I don't have to tell you all that the expectations for this year's World of Concrete were a little low, what with the collapse of the residential housing market in '07. And it's true that only 93,000 attendees were expected this year, and those who did show, did so with tightened belts much to the lament of the Las Vegas hospitality industry, at least according to our limo driver, Lucky*. But still, you can never really keep a good World of Concrete down, so let's stay positive.

First off: I think we can all agree that SANY Heavy Industry was the big winner at this year's WOC. Congratulations on your Guinness World Record setting truck mounted concrete pump boom. 66 meters long. That's over 215 feet, for those of you in the non-metric community. I never thought I'd see the day we broke 65m. Some might bemoan the record falling to the Red Chinese, but not this American. I say enjoy your success, boys. You deserve it.

Still, when I really think back on WOC2K08, I think I'll always remember it as the year that the mom jokes really made themselves. The examples of this were legion, but I think only one booth can really sum it up.

Yep. Rod Chomper, Inc. "Say, Bob... what's your line these days? Well, Joe, right now I'm with Rod Chompers. What about you? You still in the dirty pipe business?" "Nope, I joined up with Wacker, in their concrete vibrators department**."

So some might say it was an off year for the WOC, but I choose to look at the mixer as half full.

See you at World of Concrete 2009.

*Not his real name, but the limo company's name was Lucky Limos, and that's something I actually can remember, so I'm going to go with it.

**Seriously. Look it up.

I'm at woo-ooork??? - tuesday, october 30, 2007 - 10:46

Me confused. More vacation please, thank you.

But here are some photos:

There's a shit-ton, but I'll probably put together a greatest hits comp, for more casual perusing.

Nam! - saturday, october 13, 2007 - 01:37

Hi All.

Just a quick note after getting out of the pool in our hotel in Hoi An, an amazing little town outside of Da Nang. We've been here since yesterday, after taking a slightly Romanian train from Hanoi, (which was still fun and really pretty). It's the best preserved older city in Vietnam, with some amazing 18th century homes and buildings that managed to avoid being bombed in any of the various wars from last century, and is famous for its tailor, from whom we've all procured our fair share of improbably cheap custom shirts and shoes and suits. Maybe more than our fair share. The streets are tiny and irregularly paved, and despite its large tourist contingent, it's a lovely respite from Hanoi's packed intensity.

Before the train we took an overnight trip to Halong Bay which was amazing. We took a 30 person junk out, replete with 8 course meals, wonderful activies and fun new company, and spent the night on the boat, in some of the more amazing scenery I've come across. It reminded me a bit of the tobacco country in Cuba (actually, a lot of Vietnam reminds me of Cuba so far, minus the totally crumbling everything) only multiplied a hundred-fold and in the warm and inviting South China Sea.

Prior to that, we'd spent 4 days in Hanoi, a city to which the term "bustling" defines the notion of understatement. The traffic can't be explained by mere words, "Honk, beep, HONK!!!" aside, and thoroughly enjoyed its sights, hospitality and again, its food. Highlights include the Hanoi Hilton, 12 cent beers, motorscooter frogger, a profoundly misdirected, lost and confused Cyclo ride to a bar whose address we didn't know, and getting a surprise neck massage from the bathroom attendant while I peed in the bathroom of a country western bar featuring a Filipino cover band playing the likes of Abba and Debbie Gibson. It was not a gay bar, for the record. Seriously.

Tomorrow we strike out for a few days of R&R in Nha Trang, where, mostly lacking requisite cultural opportunities and obligations, we'll be exploring the beaches and islands and cuisine (oh!, the cuisine of Vietnam!) of the Southern Central Coast.

All in all, we're all having a great time, still sweating mightily, and being big fat Americans (at least compared to the tiny locals) requiring frequent breaks and rests and giant bottles of water, but I could hardly be any happier with our trip thus far.

Hope everybody's well. See you all in a couple weeks.

Open Letter to the Camary Driver In Front of Me This Morning - wednesday, september 26, 2007 - 10:38

Dear Camary Driver In Front of Me This Morning,

Greetings! I'm not sure if you noticed me during your most recent commute, but I was the bicycle rider following you closely for several blocks of Broadway this morning. I couldn't help but notice your bumper sticker, which is the reason for this correspondence. The sticker raises many interesting theological and philosophical questions, which I will attempt to address, making the good faith (pardon the pun) assumption that the sticker is indeed a real and honest attempt to engage the question, rather than simply a rote and superficial expression of piety. I considered many responses during our brief proximity, and they were all good answers. However, first and foremost, I believe that what Jesus would do, in fact, is use his fucking turn signals. He is your shepherd.



Vietnam Consulate-General of San Francisco - tuesday, september 25, 2007 - 12:52

While I wouldn't call it exactly a paragon of efficiency, they appeared to be relatively organized and the seemingly haphazard lines did, in reality, have a logic to them. Well, except when an angry old Vietnamese lady would play the "I'm an angry old Vietnamese lady" card, and rush the first available window. But I, for one, was not going to argue with them.

Fucking Sweater - thursday, september 20, 2007 - 10:54

I don't care what your "science" or your "calendars" have to say about it, but I had to wear a sweater to work this morning, making today the first official day of Fall. I'm not ready yet. Why was I not consulted on this?

Two Distinct Headlines I Read As One In This Morning's News - tuesday, september 18, 2007 - 11:27

Eyes Can't Resist Beautiful People - MTV Turns Camera On Human Trafficking In Asia

Uncle El Tim - thursday, july 19, 2007 - 11:20

My sister's ultrasound results are in! It's a boy! He has a weiner!

That's it in the middle! Also there's legs and stuff!

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